(THIS ARTICLE IS MACHINE TRANSLATED by Google from Norwegian)
Society today is par-normative. That means it is customized and gives rights to a specific type of relationship. In the face of public services and legal regulations, the diversity of conditions is not recognized. If every human being is born freely and with the same human dignity and human rights, society must give equal and consensual relationships the same rights and opportunities to live together.
The nuclear family. Freedom stands as a strong value in Norwegian society. We should have the freedom to make our own choices in our own lives. We make some choices in order to be ourselves. We make some choices to fit. But even though freedom is an important value in a democratic society, it does not mean that the society in which we live gives us the freedom to be ourselves.
Norms are unwritten rules, or expectations, of how we should be in order to fit into society. When the society is to be built, the norms are used. Health care, school, public buildings, laws and services – everything is based on an expectation of what is the norm in society. When you break the norm, it becomes clear how little diversity and inclusive society is.
Some norms are so strong that those who follow them receive benefits and legal rights, while those who violate them are left without rights. The couple norm stands strong in Norwegian society. The idea that people belong together in a form of insoluble stupidity, we encounter in most of the mainstream culture – in books, movies and commercials.
It's time to talk about relationship diversity in a rights perspective.
The nuclear family has long been a fundamental part of society. A package solution with mother, father and children, where each part can be screwed together and has its function that says something about who they should be and what they should do. The recipe is simple:
A) Find a partner. B) Enter into cohabitation or marriage. C) You have passed, you can now open your welcome pack. Congratulations! You have obtained legal rights tailored to your core family.
Diversity. But what if your relationship doesn't follow the recipe? What if your family consists of several ingredients?
The right to family and private life is one of the fundamental human rights. If your family has more than two parents, only two of them can have legal rights to the child. You risk being refused to visit your partner if they end up in a hospital. If something happens to one in the family, the third person is weaker in an inheritance settlement.
Scary propaganda from Christian conservatives portrays non-parnormative relationships as the ultimate evil and sign of the decay of society. If there are extreme attitudes that may set the agenda, so will the debate. This is how we do not set the premises for a good debate. It is time to talk about relationship diversity from a rights perspective. In Sweden, party leaders have already debated some rounds. Here in Norway, the debate has not even started.
Before, the nuclear family was needed to survive. In a modern society this is no longer the case. Still, everyone is still expected to live the same way. There have always been different forms of consensual and equal relationships that break with the couples norm: extended families where more people take responsibility for the upbringing of children. Relationships where sexual or romantic desire and sense of ownership are not a prerequisite. Relationships with more than two genders, or relationships with multiple equal partners.
No relationships or relationships are alike. It is high time that society reflects the diversity of ways people today live their lives. This means that we must look at the laws and structures that regulate cohabitation, so that all relationships based on equality and consent should have the same rights and opportunities.
Rise is the leader in Skeiv Ungdom.
eirik@skeivungdom.no.
