(THIS ARTICLE IS MACHINE TRANSLATED by Google from Norwegian)
I am proud to say that I am Norwegian Pakistani. I am proud of my culture and background. But I am not proud of the culture that Pakistan practices – a culture that is also found in countries like India, Somalia, Iran, Turkey and so on. When I say unculture, I talk about forced marriage, genital mutilation, child marriage and honor killing.
Young people suffer – both girls and boys. Women are forcibly married and killed to protect family honor. In India, for example, one child marriage is entered into every day. Children are destroyed for life.
Some bring these customs here. This means that we get internal "honorary culture refugees" in our own country. It is therefore a question of parents who are concerned about keeping old customs and culture of honor, and who make their own children refugees when they escape from this culture.
Those who live under such circumstances and do not escape often face serious psychological and social challenges.
Changing attitudes. The culture of honor is harmful. We want it gone. Here I think we are facing two challenges.
One is to change the attitudes of parents who dispute the culture of honor in their home. Everyone should be proud of their culture and background, and there is a lot of good in the Pakistani culture that has also been brought here. Most Norwegian Pakistanis are very good at showing care and love for their children. Many Norwegian Pakistanis are ambitious and take higher education. However, it is important to remember that even those who make it sharp in the education system may have parents who hold on to the culture of honor at home.
We must make changes in brothers and fathers, and make them understand that they do not own their daughters or sisters.
Give them support families. As we do this, the second challenge comes: to help those who unfortunately have to move away from their families. They must be helped to a life of dignity. Many of these lose everything. Many must cut off all contact with the family and their former network. These are often young and vulnerable people who need all the support they can get. Fortunately, there is an aid that catches many, but there are still several who fall outside. These then face enormous social difficulties.
If you are under the age of 18 and break out of a culture of honor, you may be lucky enough to get help from a foster family, and thus not be left alone. If you are over 18, however, you are often very lonely. Most people get to safety and get some follow-up from the support system, but it is difficult to get help against loneliness and fear.
I wish this group could have some kind of support family set up for them so they don't have to go through it all alone.
Therefore, I wish that this group could also have some kind of support family set up for them so that they do not have to go through all this alone.
Show care. There is much talk of social control in the media – but sometimes forced marriage can happen without the phenomenon having been present in the past. Many young people can enjoy complete freedom until their parents decide that it is time to get married. In practice, this means that they live a normal life like other young people, until they are told to get married.
Unfortunately, we must realize that these customs do not get lost so easily, even though we are working to fight it. We face major structural challenges. But many of us can open our homes to those who are fleeing the culture of honor. We must not be afraid to bring them into the heat. They have chosen to flee and we must show care. Freedom is stronger than fear.
Saturday 4. March 12 marks a march in Oslo against forced marriage and to support young people fleeing honorary cultures.
Anyone who wants to participate can attend in front of the Storting.
Akhtar is a writer and works as
volunteer in the Church City Mission.
abidaa73@hotmail.com
